When you're NOT raising babies...

I'm 26 and my husband is 32 and we DON'T have children. We have been married 5 wonderful years, own a beautiful 4 bedroom home, live comfortably and even have a dog....so by society and tradition, we should be raising babies right? I believe society has conditioned us to expect to become parents. There is this belief that women without children are not "true women" or those couples who choose not to have kids are selfish and missing out.

Here it is 2017 and it is still hard for society to wrap their heads around the idea of couples or individuals who want to live child-free. There are many arguments for both sides and honestly I don't think as adults you can really sit down and change someones mind on the matter. It is that individual or couples decision to procreate or NOT. I have heard most arguments and have had some pretty in-depth discussions on this topic. See, My husband and I are in the "child-free by choice" category but I still respect those who want to raise kiddos.

Some people want kids so they leave a legacy, experience parenting,have caregivers when they get older, grow them into World changers or some have religious reasons. Then there are people like myself...I have always loved kids and even played with baby dolls when I was a child. When I was younger I wanted 7 boys, had names picked out and thought I wanted to be a full blown sports mom. In my teenage years I babysat and enjoyed teaching younger kids. As I got older the idea of kids and parenting in general seemed not enjoyable.

When I got married my husband and I had similar views. We both respect those who choose to parent and we love children but for us, parenting seems to much like a job. Then, there are many(like myself) that have been hit my cancer or other health issues that make it super risky to have children. Also, you hardly ever hear parents go on and on about the joy of children but more the sacrifice and toll it takes on your life. It's a big life change that impacts you forever. It's not easy and you don't have to have kids to see that.

When I explain how I feel about having kids and break it down logically- taking the "cuteness" or the "tradition" out of it....it becomes less emotional and people are NOT happy. Its okay to break the mold- I mean it's 2017 in case you forgot. When I give mounds of reasons why having kids just seems...ugh.....I hear the dreadful, "You are just selfish"! Ummm Selfish?- For not caring about non-existent children? What?

We also often, "You're never emotionally or financially ready for kids, so you might as well have them". Its hard to even respond to people who utter that statement. Like it is actually painful to hear it.

All in all-Its your decision to embark on the adventure of parenthood. Some people will and others won't but that's the beauty of it. We are all unique and this makes the World a more beautiful place.

Sooooo I went off on a tangent but I promise you needed that info for the rest of this post. There are 2 pieces I wanted to leave you with.

1. Out of all that has been said upon writing this post-I just wish there wasn't a battle between those who choose to be parents vs child-free by choice couples. I wish we could break the mold for good on this topic and move on. It literally gets brought up on the daily. No one is right or wrong for THEIR DECISION to have or NOT have children. I mean you don't go home with them at the end of the day do you? (insert and eye-roll)

2. Now- for those who are still reading this and don't have kids- can I pick your brain for a moment? Besides your careers- What are things you fill your time with? My hubby stays pretty busy with work, loves gaming and is one of those life long learners. He can always keep his schedule full. I however have fallen into the same routine and find myself bored at times. I can only clean my home so much( You can probably eat of my floors). I do go to the gym weekly and have family time since both my sisters have kids.

I live in a rural area so there isn't much offered. What are some things you do? Join a book club? Learn a second language? I am really looking for advice in your day to day. When I get off work at 3pm, I don't rush home to babies or kids with sports and homework. I cook a simple meal and besides watching my certain fall series- My entire night is open. Let me know your thoughts and suggestions! Thanks

Whether your raising babies or NOT raising babies.....YOU are still IMPORTANT and LOVED! PLUS, If you are getting through life- your kind of a badass! Keep moving:)

~just a reminder~

*You know your situation, preferences, and lifestyle best. Trust it and make the best decision for you and your family.

#christianwalk #faithblog